Your Relationship With Stress: Redefined
By Guest Writer
Dr. Angela Le
When you’re feeling stressed out, being told to ‘just relax’ is one of the most unhelpful pieces of advice imaginable. It’s also simply not that easy. Stress is your body’s survival response. When danger appears, your nervous system reacts automatically, which means you cannot think your way out of it, any more than you can decide not to sweat in a sauna.
Hardwired for Stress
Although this warning system was instinctively activated to keep humans out of harm’s way thousands of years ago, it’s also the same emergency system that manages your stress response today. At times, to your detriment. For example, a sharp email, a tense conversation, or the weight of a pending business deal can ignite the same threat response your ancestors felt when fleeing a four-legged predator. If left unchecked, it can leave you feeling anxious, annoyed, and exhausted.
As a practitioner with more than 25 years of experience helping women optimize their health, well-being, and vitality, I have witnessed how unmanaged stress can devastate lives, relationships, and love. When overly strained, you may want closeness but find yourself withdrawing. You may long to be understood, yet your words come out sharp or distant. Too much stress makes connections feel less safe, even when safety is exactly what you are seeking.
When stress has no chance to resolve itself, it lingers in the body and begins to reshape how you breathe, how you think, and how you connect.
Building Your Stress Capacity
Because stress is your physiology doing its best to keep you alive, the antidote then is not to eliminate it, but to build your capacity to handle it. To deepen your well of resources to deftly meet the challenges of life while remaining connected to yourself and those you care about.
Here are my top 5 ways to build your stress capacity:
#1 HeartMath
This device uses biofeedback to bring your heart and brain into alignment. I use it daily, and the benefits have been profound. My patients often notice how quickly it helps them shift out of stress and into a calmer state. You can find the Inner Balance Coherence Plus here: HeartMath
#2 Apollo Neuro
This wearable uses gentle vibrations to support your parasympathetic nervous system and buffer daily stress. I use it regularly, and it has been a steady ally in building resilience. Patients often notice how it helps their body settle more quickly after stressful moments.
You can explore it here: Apollo Neuro
#3 Oat Straw Tea
This herbal supplement supports and replenishes the nervous system in a steady, reliable way. I recommend drinking two to four cups a day. It is simple, nourishing, and works gradually to rebuild resilience.
You can find it here: Oat Straw Tea
#4 Pendulation
Pendulation is a practice that teaches the body how to shift between activation and calm. You begin by noticing an area of tension, then bring attention to a place that feels more at ease, like your hands or the ground beneath you. By moving awareness back and forth, the nervous system learns it can return to safety. Practiced regularly, it expands your capacity to meet stress without being overwhelmed.
#5 Digital Boundaries
Stepping away from digital screens at set times gives the nervous system space to recover from constant stimulation. I recommend intentional breaks from technology, and many of my patients report better sleep and more presence when they practice this regularly.
What Stress Is Really Trying to Tell You
Stress is not a weakness. It is also not just in your head. When you learn to listen to it intuitively, it can tell you when your body needs rest, when your boundaries need protection, and when your heart needs connection. Stress can become your teacher, revealing where your capacity ends and where it has the potential to grow.
Dr. Angela Le is a Doctor of Acupuncture and Chinese Medicine, Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, biohacker, and longevity expert. For more than 25 years, she has guided women through a refined approach that combines Eastern medicine, somatic healing, and modern approaches to health optimization. Her work centers on cultivating resilience and shaping a new vision for women’s health and longevity.
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